In My Rabbit Hole

It’s 22:55 PM right now. A few quarters to February 3rd 2013. It is exactly 65 minutes until I’m officially 25 years old, entering the next adulthood year.

First of all, why a rabbit hole?

I’m inspired by my own Chinese Zodiac of course. A rabbit always have a hole that it can turn itself to when it try to find protection and comfort zone. And it applied for me too somehow.

For those who have known me so well since I was a kid, I always have a “rabbit hole” when I was running away from the outer world, looking for some inspirations, or resting period for my mind. I don’t talk much and I just enjoy my time for being so silent. Nothing more, nothing less. (That’s why I don’t like noisy place though).

Let’s say that I kinda shut myself from others when I’m in this mode. I take my time to write things down. Those who don’t know me at all might misunderstand me but well.. i don’t make a fuss over these (which has happened to me recently, caused by one unfriendly narrow-minded fellow [sigh]).

down_the_rabbit_hole_by_nimani_confused-d35aa0e

Because this is me in my solitude period. A significant period which balance everything in my soul.

I’ve been driving myself too hard lately. But then, I am reminded over and over again when I saw a chart.

Image

Which is better between fluctuation and stagnation? None.

And why does Mediocrity always lie between these two periods? Because it would always be a trigger, eventually.

Mediocrity is in need, sometimes. Not for the sake of passion. It is for the sake of stability itself.

In order to feel,

In order to do,

In order to sense.

Not to be resisted, not to be seek, but to be accepted in Harmony.

Here is safe. Here is warm-hearted. Here is the place where I find love.

To desire something is easy. To obtain it is probable. To maintain it is difficult.

We need to get along with it, not against it.

We run and run and run but get stuck sometimes.

With a little part of subconscious and logic, we are devoured by it.

Then.. it comes to my sense that “No matter how far we run, we keep running into ourself in the end.”

That behind every smile, there is always some kind of pain. Unexplained but too much to be true.

But of all things that has happened, there is always a price for every lesson in every seasons of life.

I thank the LORD for my wonderful family and best friends that still stand by my side until now.

Thank you for always been there for me, for reaching out your hands in order to pull me out of my rabbit hole when it’s been too long I’ve kept myself deep inside.

Because of all, I AM CONTENT.

I love you all from the bottom of my heart. ~Cheers~

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